Building Resilience: The Role of Therapy
When the storms of life inevitably come, do you get consumed in them, or can you stand firm as they pass by? It’s like the analogy of a tree. Due to a tree’s flexible trunk, it can bend but not break when storms hit. Trees also have deep root systems that keep them firmly grounded and provide them stability. Not to mention, any branches that may have been damaged can be regrown. How about you? Are you resilient, stable, and adaptable to the storms of life?
Understanding Resilience
Resilience is the ability to adapt well and “bounce back” from challenging life experiences such as trauma, tragedy, or significant stress. Some sources of stress can include family and relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stress. We all go through life adversities and the thoughts and strong emotions connected to such experiences. Building and increasing resilience will not only help us get through these circumstances but also help us grow and become stronger.
How Therapy Fosters Resilience
Some people can build and foster resilience outside of therapy. They may do things such as taking care of their body, monitoring and managing their thoughts, nurturing their relationships, taking part in something bigger than themselves, such as volunteering, and doing things to move them towards their goals. That’s great. But we are not all that way. For some of us, such as myself, the level of resilience that may have gotten me through one life adversity may not be enough for another. That’s where therapy can help us talk through some of our “blind spots” or learn new strategies for building resilience and moving forward in life.
Types of Therapy I use that are Beneficial for Resilience
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): This approach focuses on building psychological flexibility, which helps us adapt to adversity without being overwhelmed. In turn, this builds resilience.
Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT): A comprehensive approach that focuses on managing emotions, improving interpersonal skills, and promoting mindfulness. All of which also builds resilience.
Therapeutic Techniques for Building Resilience
ACT and DBT therapy approaches provide practical skills and mindsets promoting resilience. I always encourage my clients to have as many tools in their “toolbox.” Doing so will give them different strategies that they can use for various circumstances. Some tools may work well in one situation but not another. Also, the tool that may have been effective in a similar situation may not work well at another time. Although many of my clients and I gravitate towards using the same strategies, we learn several tools to keep in our toolbox if they will be helpful in the future. Here are some of the tools/skills/techniques that my clients learn while in therapy with me.
Mindfulness is about being present in the moment without judgment. It is an essential component of ACT and DBT therapy. Mindfulness helps manage and reduce stress and increases one's ability to maintain emotional balance, which is critical for fostering resilience.
Emotion Regulation: DBT teaches effective strategies for managing intense emotions. This, in turn, helps you respond to challenging situations with greater stability and resilience.
Distress Tolerance: DBT provides techniques for tolerating distressing situations without making impulsive or harmful decisions. This allows one to navigate crises and setbacks more effectively, which enhances resilience.
Interpersonal Effectiveness: DBT provides tools to improve your communication and relational skills. Having supportive networks enhances resilience during difficult times.
Clarifying values: ACT believes in committing to actions that align with your values. This clarity gives purpose and direction, crucial to resilience during adversity.
Defusion: This ACT concept aims to separate you from unhelpful thoughts or beliefs. This, in turn, will help reduce the impact of your thoughts on your behaviors and emotional well-being.
Benefits of Increased Resilience
Personal Well-being: Increasing resilience will significantly impact your well-being. It leads to improved mental health as you can manage your stress, reduce anxiety, and become better equipped to handle adversity. These, along with having a positive outlook on life, lead to enhanced life satisfaction.
Professional Growth: Resilience has a positive impact on professional growth. It gives you the tools to handle workplace stress and adapt to environmental changes. This may include changes and difficulties with your co-workers, leadership, or role. Those with resilience are better equipped to handle job-related stress while maintaining productivity and focus, leading to long-term success.
Social Relationships: Resilience also enhances social relationships. Resilient people manage conflicts more efficiently, leading to healthier and more meaningful interactions. They are also more likely to offer support to others and build a community of support, often having a more connected social life.
Steps to Start Building Resilience
Reflection on your current level of resilience: We all go through difficult life situations. How do you currently handle adversity? Do you feel like you respond or react? Here are some reflection questions related to the analogy of the tree:
What are the storms/challenges of your life?
Are you able to bend/adapt without breaking? If so, what is helpful? (i.e., journaling, mindfulness, practicing gratefulness).
Are you able to stand firm/rooted in the ground? What are things that keep you anchored? (i.e., people, beliefs, values, skills, passion, practices).
Are there ways to help you become more flexible? How?
Are there ways to make your roots stronger? How?
Finding a therapist: Finding a therapist doesn’t make you weak. It means you have courage—courage to face your struggles head-on and learn tools to help you during adversity. As a therapist, I reach out to therapy as needed. Sometimes, we have blind spots, and a therapist can help us find them more effectively and quickly.
Self-help resources: You may be like some people who prefer to start by working independently on improving different areas of their lives. These can include reflecting on your current level of resilience (per above), nurturing your relationships, building your community, incorporating mindfulness into your everyday life, using apps such as Calm to assist you, improving your physical health, and reading self-help books. That’s great! Way to go on taking action in your life.
Conclusion
We all go through challenging and stressful situations. Some can handle better than others. Some may have been able to handle it at one time but may find it more difficult in another life situation. If you are struggling right now, I want to encourage you to be not alone and to seek help, which isn’t a sign of weakness. You could build resilience in several ways, such as self-help methods. If you want additional support and are tired of figuring it out independently, therapy may be the route for you. If you want to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with me, head to the contact page to schedule a call.
